I Like It Breaded, Fried and Crispy

I think about a salad with no-oil, low-salt dressing. The accompanying main course would be broiled skinless chicken with steamed vegetables. Then I’d pray for a quick death. Just kill me now. Life couldn't be less worth living. There is one inescapable truth. I crave grease!

My favorite birthday food is deep fried meat. Cutlets are famous in Spain—pounded flat and breaded. From Spain, I moved to Guam during my childhood, where my new favorite restaurant was Japanese. My first love affair translated to tonkatsu, the pork cutlet, which had been adopted from Portugal. It was still my favorite when it was called schnitzel in Germany after my parents relocated yet again. And then in Korea "don gatsu" was the cutlet I adored that was adopted from Japan. When my parents settled in Alaska, my birthday food of choice became the Texas version: chicken fried steak smothered in gravy.  

If I had my way, my favorite food, tonkatsu, would be the first choice on my birthday menu, with lots of cabbage and rice on the side, a big mess of yellow mustard paste and sweet tonkatsu sauce in a dish to dip alongside.

Spare me the cake and candles and let me celebrate how I like it best—breaded, fried and crispy, please.